After a Saturday night out with comrades in London, Martin Smith Unite Against Fascism leader was returning to Essex where he is currently residing near Barking, it had been a successful evening where Smith and his group had consumed alcohol on a park bench in London, but the group was forced to move on by the police after being ordered out of the immediate vicinity or face arrest. Smith then returned to Essex, as Smith was approaching his flat, suddenly a group of doctors in white coats jumped out of a white van and charged at Smith, Martin immediately shouted out "Nazis" at the doctors. Smith was then subdued and had chloroform put over his mouth to sedate him.
The next day Smith woke up inside his apartment with a severe head ache, Martin then examined his lower torso and realised that he had acquired animal type hooves, he then looked in the mirror and noticed animal horns, Martin then shouted out "o.k who`s put acid in my cider", but there was no response, Smith then realised that he had been crossed with a goat. Martin then panicked and phoned the 999 emergency line, when the operator on the emergency line asked Smith what the problem was, Martin then explained to the operator that he was turning into a goat, and suspected that he had been the victim of a genetic experiment, the operator said to Smith that the line was for grave emergencies and serious enquiries only and that she did not share his sense of humour. The receptionist then put the phone down on Smith.
After a couple of days Smith`s Communist comrades called at Smith`s apartment to check on him. Smith appeared at the door with the chain latch attached to the door, Martin`s comrades asked him if he was o.k and that they were concerned as Smith had not turned up at the U.A.F offices. Martin stated that he was perfectly fine and that everything was o.k, one of the activists requested that Smith should allow them access to the apartment just to check if the organisation had been compromised or not, Smith said "no I can`t allow you in" but eventually Smith agreed and let his friends in the apartment. One of the activists abruptly asked Martin why he was dressed up in a goat costume, Smith responded by saying "it`s not a costume" the activist asked Martin what had happened" Smith responded in an aggressive manner and stated "I have no idea what`s happened," the others asked Smith if it had been Nazis that were responsible, Martin then stated that it possibly could have been David Cameron that was responsible for ordering the experiment in order to silence the U.A.F.
The goat horns were later removed via a chainsaw and Smith has now been forced to have special boots made in order to facilitate the change in anatomy. Martin is determined to continue with his Communist activists in his battle against Fascism.
